How to stay sober and support loved ones in recovery over the holidays

INTERVIEWER: For many people the holidays are a time of celebration and joy, but holiday stressors can pile up fast, whether it's about having to see family, or spending money on gifts. And for folks who are in recovery from alcohol, or drug addiction, it can be a difficult time of year to stay sober.

In fact, federal data shows, months of December and January see an increase in alcohol and drug-induced deaths. Joining us now to share some insight is Dr. Sheila Specker, an addiction psychiatrist with the University of Minnesota Medical School and M. Health Fairview. Doctor, welcome to the program.

SHEILA SPECKER: Oh, thank you very much.

INTERVIEWER: What are some of the common triggers during the holidays? How can they be avoided?

SHEILA SPECKER: Well, some of the common triggers are simply the fact that there is a lot of alcohol around in family gatherings, or gatherings with friends, and so it is more available, people want to fit in, they don't want to be alone, and may just have difficulty saying no. There's also certainly an increase in stress. And as you said, it can be a very enjoyable time, but it can also be a stress-filled time.

INTERVIEWER: So there can be negative associations with the holidays, how can someone maybe navigate those associations and remain more upbeat during the holidays?

SHEILA SPECKER: I think in general, taking care of oneself, doing healthy activities, self-care, such as exercise, getting sleep, but also asking for help. So there are many ways I think that families can be supportive, or friends supportive, of persons in recovery.

For instance, if there are family gatherings, offering non-alcoholic beverages, offering to not engage in alcohol use to support the person who is not drinking, asking what would be helpful from the individual. So all those things could be helpful.

INTERVIEWER: What if a person's in a situation where their family of origin is dysfunctional-- it's almost every family, I suppose, to some degree. But there's a lot of dysfunction in a family, and being with those individuals might not be a very healthy option for an individual going through treatment, what are the boundaries that someone can create to protect themselves?

SHEILA SPECKER: For sure. I think managing the individual's expectations I think is big. So often we think, oh, that this should be a very upbeat experience. For some people, it's just not. And setting limits on perhaps time spent with family, asking for help, if they're engaged in self-help, such as AA, spending more time with persons that are in recovery, because it is a very common occurrence.

INTERVIEWER: And--

SHEILA SPECKER: Being able to simply-- oh, go ahead.

INTERVIEWER: Go ahead. No. No. No, go ahead.

SHEILA SPECKER: OK. Being able to say no, I mean, may sound so simple, but it really isn't that simple. So somebody has a drink of alcohol, and they're being-- persons being offered it, being able to say very directly and very simply, "No thanks," can be very helpful.

INTERVIEWER: I'm betting too, it's probably not a good thing to isolate yourself. Yes, there are the boundaries you need to set maybe with family, but to just stay by yourself during this time I would assume might not be a very positive thing.

SHEILA SPECKER: Right. One of the things we know most about recovery is the importance of support persons that are in recovery themselves, the importance of support persons who don't have a problem, particularly getting support from people that have had this experience, that are in recovery.

We know that some of the common pitfalls of people getting back into use, of relapsing, have to do with what we call negative emotional states, which is loneliness, or depression, or anxiety, or boredom. So recognizing what those things are and taking steps to manage those. And a lot of times it's being around people that themselves are in recovery.

INTERVIEWER: So in the intro I mentioned that the months of December and January see an increase in alcohol and drug induced deaths. And I'm wondering, how concerned are you about any potential increase in addiction given that the state of Minnesota has legalized recreational marijuana? Are folks in the field expecting to be, say, busier here in the future when it comes to individuals who are having a hard time?

SHEILA SPECKER: Yes, I would expect so. When I see patients during this period of time, I will always talk about the holidays, and is that a positive experience, are they anticipating challenging circumstances? Because I know that it is a source of not just increased risk for relapse, but even in persons that do not have an addiction binge alcohol use is problematic, and more problematic probably during this season.

And one of the things that people are I think surprised at is that there's 1 in 6 individuals that regularly engage in binge drinking. And of course, that sets the stage for health problems and certainly driving while intoxicated being a major problem.

INTERVIEWER: And you expect then, again, addiction problems to get maybe a little more intense perhaps with the legalization of recreational marijuana?

SHEILA SPECKER: I do. I think other substances besides alcohol can become and will become problems because of the availability. And one of the things we talk about is that's one component that makes a substance addictive is how accessible it is. And with recreational marijuana, it's going to be accessible. And the potency also is a significant factor in how addictive a substance is.

INTERVIEWER: I have a final question, and it's this. If a family member, because we're all going to get together, most of us will get together with family, and you get to see things you might not have seen in the past year, or so, how can someone recognize addiction and maybe see that there could be a problem here and maybe help that individual get some help?

SHEILA SPECKER: I think one of the things is noticing that person is drinking in a way that can cause problems. And what's that? That might be drinking more than what's the recommendation.

The dietary guidelines now say that drinking more than two drinks can be hazardous to health. So being observant, making a comment, or noticing, or expressing concern about their family members use of substances, or in particular alcohol, I think is important.

INTERVIEWER: Doctor, thank you for your time. I appreciate it.

SHEILA SPECKER: Oh, you're very welcome.

INTERVIEWER: Dr. Sheila Specker is an addiction psychiatrist with the University of Minnesota Medical School and M. Health Fairview. Now, if you or someone you know needs help, there is a substance abuse crisis text line available 24/7. You can text home, H-O-M-E, to 741741.