A rape protest whose talk draws attention to the walk

I have served as president of Minnesota NOW since May of 2006, shortly after my daughter Miriam turned 1. Today Miriam is a spunky first grader who knows that her mom goes to meetings to talk with grownups about "girl power." That's my kid-friendly shorthand for feminism, a concept so laden with historical baggage that even many adults are confused by it.

I take words and ideas extremely seriously. Certain words are so loaded that they draw the air from a room: "feminism" is one, in certain contexts. "Rape" is another.

Today the most loaded word in the feminist vocabulary is "slut." The term is at the forefront of a new grassroots movement to end the stigmatization of survivors of rape and sexual assault.

Last January, when discussing rape prevention strategy, a Toronto police officer advised against "looking like a slut." (The officer failed to define what clothing might contribute to such a look, a crucial omission considering that, according to conservative estimates, one woman in six will be raped in her lifetime. Not all of them dressed like Snooki at a nightclub, I'm sure.) Local activists organized a protest march they dubbed SlutWalk, and more than 3,000 Toronto residents participated. Since the original walk in April, dozens more have popped up in cities across the globe, including one that will be held on the Minneapolis riverfront on Oct. 1. (Minnesota NOW is a cosponsor.)

For every enthusiastic walker, though, there is an equally frustrated person, feminist or otherwise, who brings a different set of assumptions to the word "slut" and what it means in this context. Snarky comments from pseudonymous bloggers, I anticipated; vitriolic reactions from women whom I considered feminist allies were a surprise. One in particular accused my friends and me of patriarchal collaboration -- a high crime indeed.

Also a surprise was a phone call from a reporter with the St. Paul Pioneer Press, asking to speak to me about the walk and the controversy surrounding it. In the five and a half years I've been Minnesota NOW's president, this is the first time a major newspaper has come calling. I've been active in independent and public media, but no one at the PiPress gave much thought to Minnesota NOW's lobbying of Sen. Amy Klobuchar on behalf of the newly revitalized Equal Rights Amendment, our stance on the threats to pay equity legislation and Doe vs. Gomez, among other issues. I was called because Minnesota NOW used the word "slut."

Why the lack of attention all these years? It can't be because feminism is outdated or unnecessary. I suspect it's because the hard work of moving equality forward is neither dramatic nor exciting enough to warrant column space.

Sex sells, with or without consent. In a puritanical society as baffled by sexual behavior and expression as ours, it follows that any frank discussion of sexual violence would lead to confusion. Ours is a world in which a television program about preschool girls costumed as adult women can be a hit ("Toddlers & Tiaras"), yet these girls' teenage sisters aren't allowed science-based sexual information in their schools.

Perhaps the most damning evidence of our failure to confront reality is provided by the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network: In the United States, a person is sexually assaulted every two minutes. I spoke with the Pioneer Press reporter for 30 minutes about SlutWalk, and during that time, 15 people were sexually assaulted. These 15 people are daughters, mothers, sisters -- and, lest we forget, some of them are sons, brothers and fathers. Yet our discomfort with the topic, the air-draining energy we give to words like "rape" and "slut," disrupts frank public discussion over what responsibility we all bear to stop violence.

Minnesota NOW decided to participate in SlutWalk because we too are fed up with the constant refrain, "Don't do X to avoid rape." We want the message changed to "Don't rape." Period. I challenge the opinion that SlutWalks draw negative attention. The negative attention is already here. It's called silence.

During the course of those 30 minutes, the reporter mentioned that a previous interviewee said she would fear for her daughter's safety if she were to wear a SlutWalk t-shirt in public. I replied that everything I do for women's civil rights is done to ensure that my daughter's world is a little better than the one my feminist mentors left me. Why should I accept limitations for her? Shouldn't I demand that my culture accept her dignity, her humanity and her bodily autonomy? In the end, the one quote he used was about feminists in provocative clothing.

Miriam, Mommy has work to do.

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Shannon Drury, president of Minnesota NOW, is a writer, at-home parent and community activist. She writes a regular column for the Minnesota Women's Press, with additional work appearing in HipMama, Literary Mama and Skirt magazines. She blogs at www.theradicalhousewife.com and is a source in MPR's Public Insight Network.

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